Reaching out

We both spent a little wakeful time in the middle of the night thinking "what if?" thoughts. It doesn't solve anything, but it happens anyway. In a couple of hours we'll get the results of yesterday's blood tests, tomorrow I'll have a C-T scan, and Tuesday I'll see the oncologist. Thank God, He already knows what we'll find out, and--more importantly--He already knows the absolutely best outcome and He will make that happen.

A few days ago, I mentioned the new film "Magdalena: Released from Shame," which includes the hemorrhaging woman who crept through the crowd to touch the fringe of Christ's shawl in her search for healing. My cousin, in response, sent me this reflection, which she wrote some years ago:

I am going to see the healer
I don't care that I am unclean . . .
I won't announce myself; I'll just go.
I've heard of healings; and maybe --

Reaching.
All I have to do
is reach out to
last chance Jesus.

I am reaching,
reaching for the fringe
of your prayer shawl.
I have to touch the edge
before I come to the abyss--
I mean
I am on the edge.
I must reach past my isolation.
I mean
No one and nothing has helped;
There has been no cure.

Just the fringe--
I only need to reach
A chance
with last chance Jesus.

Thanks, Ammie. As Bible readers know, Jesus didn't let the dear, healed woman sneak off the way she had come. He made eye contact, applauded her faith, confirmed her healing, and restored her dignity. So today and every day I'm reaching for Jesus.

A blog reader, whom I've never met, did some research on the two new blood tests I got yesterday. BUN stands for blood urea nitrogen; in ratio with creatinine, it measures the health of the kidneys to determine if it's okay to administer the contrast dye for the C-T scan. I'm sure there will be no problem.

I'll put up a short posting later this morning after we get the CA 125 (tumor marker) number. I'm praying "low" on that one, but making no predictions.

Blessings,
Carol