Why?

A very precious friend asks why his cancer appears to be cured and mine isn't. He understands about God's sovereign privilege to do as He chooses, so it's not that kind of "why." You all have been so faithful to keep praying all these 25 months, and even just for your sakes I'd love for God to answer Yes. So here's a new prayer request: please ask God to show me if there are reason in me--attitudes or sins--that prevent His healing work. I don't mean to book a ticket on a guilt trip, but even the psalmist prayed, "Cleanse me from secret faults."

Last weekend's reading in our devotional, indeed, is titled "When Prayer Doesn't Work." The author, Andrew Wheeler, lost his mother to cancer 20 years ago, and describes his struggle: Was God unhearing? Unfeeling? Unable to answer my prayers? Was I praying with wrong motives? Was it lack of faith or sin in my life that was keeping God from answering? Was it somehow my fault that prayer hadn't worked and that Mom wouldn't be coming home? "The standard prayer platitudes," he says, "do little to provide comfort or strengthen faith when you're standing next to a hospital bed and all the monitors are silent."

He considers several examples of "unanswered" prayer in the Bible, and concludes he still doesn't understand. "But I am learning to trust in God's grace, even when I don't understand His ways. The times when I miss Mom the most are the very times I find myself most leaning into God's strength. . . . Most of all, I'm discovering that submitting my requests to God is exactly that--submitting to Him. Whether He says yes or no, I try to be more concerned for His work in my life than for His response to any one specific prayer. I'm learning that if my focus is on God, even unanswered prayer can be a catalyst for growth in my walk with Him."

That's what I want, for myself and also for those who love me. Meanwhile, I'm healed for today, and continuing to pray that God will drive this cancer out of my body. At no point can it reach the severity that is too great for Him to heal.

Dear friends from Michigan are coming this morning for a one-day visit. We look forward to a sweet time. And tomorrow at 10:30 we'll see Dr. Boyd; thanks for your prayers.

Fully Relying On God,
Carol