Absolutely his

The Cytoxan hadn’t arrived from the insurance company, so yesterday I received only one drug—the VP-16. No effects whatsoever, and I returned at once to work. The doctor had ordered another complete blood count; I wondered what could have changed since Thursday. I’m delighted to report that my white blood count (infection resistance) went up .9! It’s only been 4 days. Looks to me like an answer to prayer. The red cells and hemoglobin dropped very minutely—nobody is worried about that.

Tomorrow I’ll probably get both chemo drugs, and I’m expecting no problems. Then Wednesday I’ll get only the VP-16. The doctor wants my blood cells monitored every week. In three weeks we’ll test the CA 125 again, and then we’ll probably proceed to another three days of infusions like this week.

A friend in Hungary is studying the book of 1 Peter with her friends. It’s one of my favorite books. She sent these comments from some study notes:

“Do I believe God is in control of my life down to the tiniest details?”
“Do I believe God has me where he wants me to be right now?”

An affirmative answer to these questions certainly brings peace. She learned that Oswald Chambers, author of My Utmost for his Highest, often wrote a three-word sentence near the end of his letters, a sentence backed up by his personal life: “Be absolutely his.” My friend's notes continued: "The book of 1 Peter, with all its practical instruction, could be outlined with those three words:

Be absolutely his at home. Not yours, but his.
Be absolutely his at church. Not yours, but his.
Be absolutely his on the job. Not yours, but his.
Be absolutely his in the classroom. Not yours, but his.
Be absolutely his in every relationship. Not yours, but his."

To which I add:
Be absolutely his when hooked up to a kemo I-V. Not yours, but his.

That resolves a lot of dilemmas, doesn’t it?

I'm struggling to shake off tiredness. I'll see how the next hour goes; maybe I'll decide I need a nap, despite a wonderful night's sleep.

Blessings,
Carol